Baby J- It's official

I have always wanted to be a mom.  I can't even remember a time in my life where I didn't have some job or activity that kept me interacting with kids.  I have always loved kids, always thought I would have a family of my own.  Live did not turn out exactly how I planned.  No man has come along and no family.   So four years ago, I decided to change some of that.   I started actively seeking out adoption- I'd thought of it many times before and never been opposed to the idea, but
had never really actively sought it out.   I spent two years doing what I thought was foster to adopt and fostered 8 children.  I loved all of those kids, who each came with a unique challenge, and would have taken any of them - but it wasn't meant to be.  After finding out my adoption stuff never got turned in and after realizing even more how much those first couple years were I started the process of private infant adoption (please note I was not opposed to the idea of adopting a little older and someday would even consider returning to foster/adoption through that system).  I knew this was an important thing to me.   The past two years have been a roller coaster of emotions.  I had my profile shown over 20+ times, and because I was single many parents didn't even consider me despite all I have to offer.   I understand, but it still was frustrating and sad.   Now I know though that God had the perfect little girl in mind and today after 4 years and some change, I am officially and legally a mother.   Yes I've been her mom now for several months (almost 5 months), but to have the legal paper work is such a huge thing and a huge relief.   No one can come and 'take her back' and I can finally take control of all her papers and decisions.  

Even though I've been in this process for several years, I could never imagined where I would be today.  With a new place to live, a new job, and a beautiful little girl.   A little girl who has taught me what true persistence and love is.   A little girl who despite not knowing me till a week after birth, knows that I'm her mommy and smiles for me and laughs for me and every day shows me how incredible she is.   I am so lucky and blessed to be matched with such a wonderful little girl.  

My family (minus one taking the pic)

 
I have also realized how blessed I am by my friends and family.   I have always known how wonderful they are, but their support with my foster kids and through all of this adoption has been so amazing.  I could not have done any of this journey without them (especially with starting a new job) and I'm so happy to have Baby J join this family.  

 

I have also seen the good of the world.  So many people have prayed for us and helped us out.  Never would I have ever thought I would have spent an entire summer in a NICU and in another city.   People helped me stay there and without the prayers so many people sent up and the wonderful words from everyone, I don't think Baby J would have done so well.   She is happy and healthy and has overcome so much.   And I have seen such support that it has meant so much to me.  

 

Today was quick, but such a big day.  So many of my family showed up to watch our adoption take place.   I think we surprised the judge and my lawyer with the amount of people (and I know there were many that would have been there if they could have).  It was nice though when the judge said something about me being single and said, but I can tell you have a very good support system.   We filled half the courtroom.   It literally took about 3 minutes for the actual adoption to take place.  We went to celebrate afterward and had lunch together.   Thank you to everyone who was able to come that did come.  

Today was the second best day of my life, only being overshadowed by the day I met my daughter.    I can't even begin to relay how lucky/blessed I feel right now.  Nor can I ever truly show the gratitude that I feel toward the family, friends, and even strangers who helped me out or prayed for us.  

As far as a Baby J update, she is growing.  We are starting to replace her newborn clothing with 0-3, have moved up to size 1 diapers, and even moved her car seat belts from the tiniest position.   She is full of smiles and is so close to laughing.   While we are still a spit up baby, it has improved some.   She loves to pull her toys and is even starting to hold them.   Sadly we have caught our first cold and is showing signs of that today, but so far it's minimal and hopefully will clear up quickly.  She should be starting some RSV shots that will help lesson effects of RSV.   I don't know her weight right now, but would guess somewhere around 8.5 lbs.  maybe a little less.   When she starts to get her shots they will weigh her.   Please continue to pray for her that we make it through the winter without any major illnesses.  RSV scares me a lot, knowing that it would land her back in the hospital and could even be deadly for her.  While the shots are not a preventative, they should help lesson any effects if she does get it.    WE have been very lucky that she hasn't gotten sick before now...but her cousins wanted to share something with her.   We had a great Halloween and she slept through our entire trip tot he aquarium with my nephews.  

Again thank you everyone for all you have done.

After our very busy adoption day!